Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
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