Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
