dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
