THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I want a musical about memes.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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