I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize