Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
