I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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