YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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