my vag is so smooth its legendary
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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