Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
