OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
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