Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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