Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
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