Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize