I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
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