I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
