You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize