I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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