So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
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I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
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I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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