I'm so fucking centered right now
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Randomize