Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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