your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Randomize
