how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
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