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• (941): View more from Florida

  I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"

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• (765): View more from Indiana

  He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family

  (812): View more from Indiana

  Not even marginally surprised

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.

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• (575): View more from New Mexico

  not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (214): View more from Texas

  You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?

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• (719): View more from Colorado

  I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Oh god, what has my life become?

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend

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• (315): View more from New York

  The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.

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• 

  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (615): View more from Tennessee

  and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction

  (571): View more from Virginia

  Done

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• (361): View more from Texas

  She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.

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• (413): View more from Massachusetts

  How was your night?

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party

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• (501): View more from Arkansas

  I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success

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