He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Randomize
