U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
