when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Randomize
