why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Randomize
