Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
