? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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