I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
