Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
