I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize