Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Randomize
