I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
