Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
