Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Randomize
