I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
