she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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