a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
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