i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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