Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize