We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize