I love black thongs
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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