Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
