Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
