Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis? http://tfl.nu/6d0w
  Replies (7) Good night (928) Bad night (573)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single. http://tfl.nu/sipf
  Replies (46) Good night (891) Bad night (4145)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone http://tfl.nu/o3t4
  Replies (8) Good night (4459) Bad night (797)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face. http://tfl.nu/zq8n
  Replies (73) Good night (1324) Bad night (8174)
• Favorite

  (571): View more from Virginia

  I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (571): I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub. http://tfl.nu/fw5s
  Replies (21) Good night (1499) Bad night (4475)
• Favorite

  (831): View more from California

  Don't EVER smell your tampon

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (831): Don't EVER smell your tampon http://tfl.nu/zvwb
  Replies (89) Good night (1533) Bad night (19782)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (740): well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong. http://tfl.nu/972k
  Replies (12) Good night (4646) Bad night (972)
• Favorite

  (862): View more from New Jersey

  just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (862): just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work http://tfl.nu/zbvu
  Replies (3) Good night (2498) Bad night (1133)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (818): well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning http://tfl.nu/ywc2
  Replies (18) Good night (4732) Bad night (2425)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): 2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless. http://tfl.nu/7smn
  Replies (16) Good night (4232) Bad night (798)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either. http://tfl.nu/a1p0
  Replies (9) Good night (2032) Bad night (763)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (608): We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth. http://tfl.nu/k58a
  Replies (29) Good night (2298) Bad night (985)
• Favorite

  (347): View more from New York

  we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (347): we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now http://tfl.nu/ncyn
  Replies (3) Good night (590) Bad night (1009)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.

  (1-309): View more from Illinois

  I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment. (1-309): I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college. http://tfl.nu/zbsh
  Replies (7) Good night (1313) Bad night (658)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+61): Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry http://tfl.nu/2c34
  Replies (6) Good night (462) Bad night (778)

Randomize