I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize