There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
