we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
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